Should Students Be Paid For Good Grades Essay Checker

Hello ^^
I have an argumentative essay titled 'Should students be paid for getting good grades". Please give some advice in any areas or point out my errors. I am open to all comments since this is my first time doing an argumentative essay. This essay is due soon so I really need help.

English Argumentative Essay - Should kids be paid for good grades?
In childhood, children get a candy for a job well done. In school, students get a treat for a job well done. In society, adults get paid with money for a job well done. However, it seems that students are getting paid for getting good grades lately. Cash incentives are used to motivate students to study harder and achieve better grades. The question now is should students get rewarded with cash for good grades?

Yes, I agree that students can get motivated to study if they are paid for good grades. Providing a monetary reward enables the students to focus and study in class. However, I strongly feel that they should not be paid for their good grades.

One school in Chicago implemented this policy to reward students based on their grades. However, after one year, the school was forced to discontinue this policy due to the lack of funds. Though this policy is effective, it is short- lived; the cost of this policy is not possible for schools to uphold. Some may argue that reducing the amount of cash rewards the students receive would solve the problem. This would also result in the decrease in effectiveness of this policy. As students do not find the cash reward appealing, they would not be motivated to study, which diminishes the purpose of the policy. Thus, this policy would not be sustained for long.

Based on a study made by Massachusetts Institute of Technology, money is not a very effective motivator. If a task is simple, straight forward and involves only mechanical skills; then a higher pay would result in a better performance. However, if the task is complicated that requires conceptual, creative thinking and involves rudimentary cognitive skills; it would not be successful at all. Instead, it would be the complete opposite! Many studies have also proved that recognizing student's accomplishments is the ultimately the best motivator. According to Sylvia Rimm, a child psychologist, consistency plays a much more major role in achievement than money does. For example, top students would also try to maintain their results with consistent effort. Whereas, others who failed give up easily as they find that there is no hope in them getting rewards and compliments. Therefore, money is not a good motivator.

Studying is students' responsibility. Students should study because they want to, not forced to. It is also wrong to lure students into studying by using cash as it gives them an idea that everything revolves around money which is a bitter truth that they are too young to learn. This monetary policy encourages the wrong things. Students may get so caught up in focusing on making more money that they assumed getting good grades is purely for the money and not for learning. Hence, this policy would lose the real purpose of learning in life and also diminishes the purpose of school. Students would lose their interest in learning once the rewards are gone. Moreover, students would not take learning seriously and see not point in learning. Studying benefits one and the good grades one attains would come in handy to land a job and decide one's future. Being paid to study teaches the wrong values to students. They would not be determined to strive harder to get the grades for themselves and not for the money. They would have no sense of satisfaction because all they want is more money. They would lose sight of what really matters.

A science research done by the Royal Society of Art shows that there are three factors that would lead to better personal performance and personal satisfaction. The first factor is autonomy, the desire to be self-directed, to use our judgment and creativity to direct our lives. Second factor is mastery, the urge to excel. People practice and spend time doing things because it is fun and satisfying. Last factor is purpose - a transcendent purpose that goes beyond profit. Students should be motivated by these three factors to achieve better grades.

In conclusion, students should not be paid for getting good grades. In the process, they are being taught the wrong character attributes and confused themselves with what matters and does not matters. Moreover, the policy cannot be sustained due to the lack of funds and studies have also proven that money is a bad motivator.

Thanks for taking you time to read and/or comment!
Bye!

I agree with the idea that students can be motivated to study if they are paid for good grades.

As students do not find the cash reward appealing, they would not be motivated to study, which diminishes the purpose of the policy. Thus, this policy would not be sustained for long.


I wonder, specifically, if you could add any more details about the chicago experiment, when they tried giving money for good grades. I wonder how a student qualified for good grades, was it actually cash, or a gift card? I wonder if they were paid quarterly, or at the end of the year, and if the reward was based in improvement, or only high grades.

If a task is simple, straight forward and involves only mechanical skills; then a higher pay would result in a better performance. However, if the task is complicated that requires conceptual, creative thinking and involves rudimentary cognitive skills; it would not be successful at all.

Excellent point, nice job explaining this contrast.

Whereas, others who failed give up easily as they find that there is no hope in them getting rewards and compliments.
I would re-word and strengthen this sentence, as it is a key point that you are making.

chalumeau  

Mar 17, 2012   #3

**try to write the introductory paragraph again. Try to make it about 4 to 5 sentences.

One school in Chicago implemented a policy to reward students based on 1) their grades. However, after one year, the school was forced to discontinue this policy due to the lack of funds. 2) Though this policy 3)is effective, it is short-lived; the cost of this policy is not possible for schools to uphold. Some 4)may argue that reducing the amount of cash rewards the students receive would 5) solve the problem. 6) This would also result in the decrease in effectiveness of this policy. 7) As students do not find the cash reward appealing, they would not be motivated to study, which diminishes the purpose of the policy. 8) Thus, this policy would not be sustained for long.

1)Too vague. Be more specific. e.g. for A's and B's. Where's the citation?
2) I prefer "although" to "though" at the beginning of a sentence.
3) Tense switches here. Maintain tense or transition appropriately. Citation?
4) The use of "may" is weak here. Remove. Think about creating another paragraph here.
5) Would it "solve the problem" or "lengthen the program's duration?"
6) You are trying to make a "however" point, but you are unclear.
7) Conditional sentence without the conditional tense. "If students do not find the cash reward appealing, they would be less motivated to study."
8) Conclude with a summation that the program is impossible to sustain in a large urban school district.

Based on a study 9)made by Massachusetts Institute of Technology, money is 10) not a very effective motivator. If a task is simple, straightforward and involves only mechanical skills 11); then a higher pay would result in a better performance. 12) However, if the task is complicated that requires conceptual, creative thinking and involves rudimentary cognitive skills; it would not be successful at all. Instead, it would be the complete opposite! Many studies have also proved that recognizing 13) student's accomplishments is 14) the ultimately the best motivator. According to Sylvia Rimm, a child psychologist, consistency plays a 15) much more major role in achievement than money does. 16) For example, top students would also try to maintain their results with consistent effort. Whereas, others who failed give up easily as they find that there is no hope in them getting rewards and compliments. Therefore, money is not a good motivator.

9) "Made by" to "by researchers at the"
10) "an ineffective motivator."
11) Change the ";" to ","
12) "On the other hand, if the task requires creative thinking and other higher cognitive skills, then performance is not correlated with pay."
13) students'
14) Remove "the"
15) Change "much more major" to "more important." Citation?
16) Change to "She found that students previously rated as 'high-performers' showed consistent effort to maintain their status, whereas students rated as 'low-performers' showed less effort to maintain theirs."

17)"It is also wrong..." Try to avoid this construction in an argumentative essay. Labeling something as "wrong" does not make it wrong.

18) Avoid run-on sentences. "...to lure students into studying by using cash as it gives them an idea that everything revolves around money which is a bitter truth that they are too young to learn." Break up this sentence.

19) "Students may focus too intently on outcomes and assume that good grades equal earnings, not learning." Suggestion

20) I enjoyed reading about the three factors. They make sense.

Overall, I feel that you have good evidence and research, but your analysis is a little weak. Try to ask yourself questions about the studies you read. Can you think up a scenario and apply something you learned to solve it? Also, try to stay in the present tense as much as humanly possible. Very good start.

this introductory is contradictory as be sure they should be paid for good grade or should not be paid.

Yes, I agree that students can get motivated to study if they are paid for good grades. Providing a monetary reward enables the students to focus and study in class. However, I strongly feel that they should not be paid for their good grades.

i did no go further checking, please be sure in what direction are writing read twice and thrice your writing try to find mistakes yourself at first. Type a essay daily in computer and edit yourself.

I liked the essay and the way you expressed it. Nice points you have covered



Back in the day, a good report card earned you a parental pat on the back, but now it could be money in your pocket. Experiments with cash incentives for students have been catching on in public-school districts across the country, and so has the debate over whether they are a brilliant tool for hard-to-motivate students or bribery that will destroy any chance of fostering a love of learning. Either way, a rigorous new study — one of relatively few on such pay-for-performance programs — found that the programs get results: cash incentives help low-income students stay in school and get better grades. (See TIME's special report on paying for college.)

According to a study released today by the social-policy research group MDRC, a nonpartisan organization perhaps best known for evaluating state welfare-to-work programs, cash incentives combined with counseling offered "real hope" to low-income and nontraditional students at two Louisiana community colleges. The program for low-income parents, funded by the Louisiana Department of Social Services and the Louisiana Workforce Commission, was simple: enroll in college at least half-time, maintain at least a C average and earn $1,000 a semester for up to two terms. Participants, who were randomly selected, were 30% more likely to register for a second semester than were students who were not offered the supplemental financial aid. And the participants who were first offered cash incentives in spring 2004 — and thus whose progress was tracked for longer than that of subsequent groups before Hurricane Katrina abruptly forced researchers to suspend the survey for several months in August 2005 — were also more likely than their peers to be enrolled in college a year after they had finished the two-term program. (Read "Putting College Tuition on Plastic.")

Students offered cash incentives in the Louisiana program didn't just enroll in more classes; they earned more credits and were more likely to attain a C average than were nonparticipants. And they showed psychological benefits too, reporting more positive feelings about themselves and their abilities to accomplish their goals for the future. "It's not very often that you see effects of this magnitude for anything that we test," notes Thomas Brock, MDRC's director for young adults and postsecondary-education policy.

Although U.S. college enrollment has climbed, college completion rates have not. Only a third of students who enroll in community colleges — which educate nearly half the undergraduates in the U.S. — get a degree within six years. Hence the interest in this study among such philanthropic powerhouses as the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, which helped fund the MDRC study. (MDRC, by the way, was created in 1974 by the Ford Foundation and a group of federal agencies; originally named the Manpower Demonstration Research Corporation, it now goes only by the abbreviation.)

Given that the follow-up study of the program was disrupted as the schools struggled to rebuild enrollment and facilities in the wake of Katrina, it's difficult to draw any long-term conclusions about the effects that cash incentives will have on community-college students. However, there could soon be more data to parse: with a grant from the Gates Foundation, MDRC plans to test cash incentives at community and state colleges in California, New Mexico, New York and Ohio.

Despite the study's impressive, albeit short-term results, some critics in higher education are concerned that cash incentives will encourage students to start taking easier courses to ensure they'll do well enough to pocket the money. "Everyone knows what the gut classes are when you're in college," notes Kirabo Jackson, an assistant professor of labor economics at Cornell who has studied cash incentives for high school students. "By rewarding people for a GPA, you're actually giving them an impetus to take an easier route through college." Other critics note that students' internal drive to learn may be sapped as they focus on getting an external reward.

But those involved with the study note that particularly in this economy, cash incentives could help part-time students devote more hours to their studies. Faced with soaring bills for tuition, books and housing, many college students need a job just to get by. In the Louisiana program, all the participants were low-income parents, three-quarters of whom were unmarried or living without a partner. "We're talking about adults who have quite a number of other responsibilities," says Brock. "When you're talking about minors who are required by law to be in school, that's a different situation."

Arnel Cosey, assistant vice chancellor for student affairs and provost for the City Park Campus at New Orleans' Delgado Community College, one of two schools in the study, says she understands why some people are concerned that cash incentives are nothing more than bribery. "But on the other hand, I think because I am involved with these students daily, I'm not sure that I'm opposed to bribing," she says. "If that's what we need to do for these people to reach these goals, which ultimately will lead to them having a better life, I wish I had more money to give."

Besides, as Cosey adds, if all goes well, students will be getting cash incentives for their work soon after graduating — in the form of a paycheck. "Most of us wouldn't turn up at work every day if we weren't getting a check," she says. "What's wrong with starting the payment a little early?"

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